Together
by jonsamforever
Summary: Shane wanted Rick to kill him. Alternate ending to "Better Angels" Episode 2.12 Rick/Shane, AU, Slash


Title: Together

Rating: M

Characters: Shane Walsh, Rick Grimes

Warnings: spoilers, language, slash

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. This is simply a tribute.

Summary: This is my interpretation of how The Walking Dead episode "Better Angels' _should_ have ended.

The sky appears darker than before in the field where the two men stand. The crisp night air fills Rick's lungs and his breath is seen as he speaks, "Listen to me Shane, there's still a way back from this. Nothing has happened here. We're gonna lay down our guns and we're gonna walk back to the farm together," Rick holds out his gun to Shane, inching closer as he speaks, "Back to Lori, back to Carl….put this all behind us."

Shane looks into Rick's calm blue eyes. Even in this darkness Shane can still see the piercing blue of those damn eyes. Shane slowly reaches out and takes Rick's gun as if he were in a trance. He drops it on the soft grass along with his own. Before either man can speak Rick swiftly grabs Shane by the arm and pulls Shane's body in against his. He throws his arms around the broken man and holds on so tightly as if he were holding onto something for dear life. As if he held on tightly enough all the pain and hurt might go out of Shane's body. Both men fall against each other to their knees. Shane crumples into Ricks arms and sobs into his shoulder. The floodgates opening up as if months or even years of emotions have broken through a dam and there's no stopping it.

"I wanted you to kill me," Shane sobs. The musky smell of Rick's shirt and skin fills his nose.

"I know brother, I kinda figured it out."

Shane buries his face into Rick's shoulder,"I'm so sorry Rick, I'm so sorry for everything."

"Shhhhhh hush now, Shane it's gonna be alright now. It's all over. You're gonna come back to me."

Shane begins sobbing even harder now, "I don't wanna live in a world anymore where you don't trust me. Where we're at each other's throats all the time. Where you hate me."

"Shane, that's not true."

"You'd rather take Daryl as your wingman instead of me now."

"Nonsense man and you really think I could ever shoot you Shane? You're my damn best friend."

Shane pulls away from Rick's shoulder and looks at his face. His eyes puffy from the tears, "Yeah I guess I knew that when you came back for me on that damn school bus…..Rick I just wanted to leave and I wanted you to put me out of my misery so I figured the only way I could get you to do it is to trick you like that. Say a bunch of shit I didn't mean. Shit that would get you to take care of it, end this nightmare for me."

"Yeah well I think you had me fooled for about two seconds," Rick puts his hand on Shane's shoulder and grabs tightly to the fabric, "Shane, I'm not stupid, I know you. You don't think I knew that? Shit Shane I know you better than you know yourself. I knew what you were up to and you know I could never shoot you. Shit if you wanna know the truth I'd stay alive to keep you alive because I can't do this without you."

"I know right," Shane says laughing through tears. He wipes the tears and snot from his nose on his sleeve. Sobbing subsiding, he looks down at the ground, "I'll never forget that day I saw you come back like a ghost. I thought I'd lost you forever….and then you were here." Shane stops for a moment, lifts his head and looks Rick dead serious in the eyes, "Rick I killed Otis for you…. to save Carl for you. Everything I did I did for you. To make sure I'd never lose you again. To keep you and Lori and Carl alive. To keep us all together," he confesses.

Rick's blue eyes fill with the feelings of so many mixed emotions: shock, disbelief, sorrow, tenderness, pride, understanding…love.

"Rick, you have to understand, I only slept with Lori because I thought you were dead, we both did. Or maybe I just slept with Lori to keep you alive in my mind because I thought I had lost you."

"Shane I know, I get it and I forgive you for that and I will always forgive you for that. You don't even have to mention it. Shit we were crazy man, the world ended!"

"Rick, I thought you were gonna leave me on that bus but you came back for me."

"Of course I came back for you."

The tears start rolling down Shane's cheeks again.

Rick cups Shane's face in his hands, "Shhh shhhh," He pulls Shane in and hugs him forcefully, "Shane, Shane damn you," Finally realizing what this is all about. Realizing what Shane must have been going through. How hard it was to deal with making the choice of taking a life to save a life. To save Carl's life for him, "Shane, this crazy world falling apart around us, I don't ever want to leave you. We gotta stick together. You know it's a miracle that the two of us survived this mess so far," Rick pulls away and cups Shane's face again. He places one hand behind Shane's head and feels the stubble from Shane's buzz cut against his fingertips; all that beautiful, dark curly hair gone, "Shane listen, things are gonna change from now on, I promise. I'm not gonna let you go crazy on me you hear?" He shakes Shane's head gently, "I've been oblivious to what you've been going through but not anymore okay? It's you and me buddy, you and me. Just like when we were back on the force. You gotta meet me half way though okay?"

Shane looks into Rick's eyes, "Okay"

"I mean it buddy no more messin' around. We gotta keep the farm safe. Safe for Lori and Carl. Safe for us."

Rick can see the life starting to come back into Shane's eyes, "You're gonna come back to me now okay?"

Shane looks Rick in the eyes. "Rick as long as I know you got my back you know I'll do anything for you."

Rick stops and looks at Shane, "You were right all along Shane, right about everything. You were right about Sophia. She was dead the whole time and I didn't wanna believe it. You were right that Carl needed to talk to me and not his Mom about that walker he saw," Rick pauses about to say something that he doesn't want to say; something that he's feared admitting for so long. A tear rolls down his cheek, "And I suppose you were right that I can't keep them safe."

Shane reaches out and grabs Rick by the back of the neck and pulls their foreheads together, "Rick, we can keep them safe….together."

"Dad?"

* * *

Comments: I was so sad to see Rick and Shane split up on the show that I wrote this alternate ending where Shane lives. I'm really gonna miss these two when The Walking Dead returns in October. All comments/reviews are appreciated enormously.


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